Friday, July 23, 2010

IDOLED part 4

The Man with the Megaphone finally approached my section. He thanked us for our patience and told us to get out our waivers and our seat tickets. We paraded up and out of the section, down the outer stairs, back into the first level and onto the arena floor.

Have you seen this opening scene in Pirates of the Caribbean 3, where the prisoners are lined up and singing their death song? That is what it felt like. Walking to the guillotine. Slowly inching forward, waiting for your fate…

The kid next to me asked what I was song I was singing. I told him. HE’D NEVER HEARD OF STAND BY YOUR MAN. Really? Unbelievable. It’s only as classic as they come.

Eventually we were at the front of the queue. We were told to head to Table 11. There were two lines ahead of us, so I put down my things and waited. Finally, it was our turn to sing.

Our judges were two very tired females. They look EXHAUSTED. Pretty sure they weren’t sitting on the street at 5 am though.

The first boy sang. One judge held her hand up and stopped him. “Thank you, next.” A girl sang. “Thank you, next.” The kid next to me sang. “Thank you, next.” They looked at me. IT WAS MYYYYYYYYYYYY TURRRRRRRRRRRRN. TWELVE HOURS LATER.

The thing about this particular table was that these judges were stopping contestants after about ten seconds. Earlier in the day, some judges were letting people sing for 20 or 30 seconds. So I didn’t know what point they’d cut me off, if at all. Total crap shoot. But I did my best.

“Thank you very much. Okay, you four grab your stuff and come on up.”

We grabbed our bags and gear and then approached the table in unison.

“First of all, thanks so much for waiting today. You guys all need to work on strengthening your voice, and then please come back and audition again next year, okay?”

Strengthen my voice. I really wanted to ask what that meant? Make it better, or just sing with more power? Did they want me to belt? Because that, I can do. They didn’t let me get to my high note at the end of the chorus! Guess I should have started at a different place.

So with my head held high, I let someone snip my wristband and exited to the left. I even blew a kiss to the camera that was waiting to catch any good “incidents” as people left the arena. Nothing to see here, American Idol. No tears or hard feelings whatsoever.

Later, I found out that the auditions went until just past 9 pm. I also read there were some returning contestants there. I didn’t see any of them myself, but apparently the irritating pageant girl from Florida is back, Shelby from last year is back, and there were more rumored previous contestants that were in attendance. I guess we will all have to tune in to Fox in January to see who makes the cut!

All things considered, I really am glad I did this once. Are there things I wish I had known to do or try differently? Well sure – but isn’t that the case with any big experience? My biggest regret is still my poor Cheerios, and if that’s the worst thing I lost, then I’d say I came out on top. I've been saying for years that Idol is a good show but not a fair contest, so with low expectations, it was hard to be disappointed about anything.

Besides, I don’t care how talented you are, if this guy can’t win, then there’s no hope for the rest of us.

1 comment:

  1. It's so tragic how they snip your wristband! Hopefuls dreams are cut in two with a pair of household scissors.


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