BROKE

Nothing funny or clever to say today, kids. Those of you who have been inquiring about my shoulder, thanks for the concern. It was still pretty painful on Saturday, but I woke up Sunday and felt great. I could lift my arm and move it around with minimal pain. And today it's even better.

So the good news is now I have one less thing to worry about. The bad news is that's only one less thing to worry about out of what feels like five billion mounting things.

Oh, I have a computer update. I got an e-mail last week saying service was complete and to come pick up my computer. One small problem: I didn't authorize any service. Best Lie strikes again. I called them and found out that all this time my computer was sitting at Geekville HQ and they were calling the wrong number over and over trying to find out what I'd like them to do with the computer. Here's what I want you to do, Geeks: put four wheels and an engine on it and send it back to me immediately. Regardless, they sent it off again only after I made sure they had three different numbers at which to call me, and I should be hearing from them again any day now. At which point I'll probably tell them I can't afford to fix it anymore but thanks for playing.

So lately in my spare time, when I'm not bumming rides or hounding my insurance agent or bothering my computer repairman, I've been focusing on what really matters in life: Saturday Night Live and deciding what I want to be for Halloween.