Wednesday, July 16, 2008


When life hands you a lemon, make lemonade.

Or, in my case, when life takes one of your best friends away for eight weeks, make him blog about it.

Evan, one of my Nashville besties, is taking a job to work a booth at four different state fairs for eight weeks. It's a well-paying job that he is excited about. I am not. He'll be gone, and then what will I do? Who will play with me?

But after all, I suppose if there's anywhere I'd want him to leave me for, it'd be New York. Then Los Angeles. And then four different state fairs across the midwest. Haha.

Now. Some of you may remember my own state fair "experiences" from October (let me jog your memory if you're new: I came, I saw, I conquered). Needless to say, I am not the best advocate for the life of a carnie. "Don't do it," I advised him. "Nothing good happens at those state fairs - or on the way there! The food is fun for the first five hours, everything's all fried and buttered and chocolate coated, but then all you can think about is a garden salad or some fresh vegetables. It'll drive you crazy, man. Fourteen hour days? Surrounded by rednecks? Who are only interested in your product if they can win it, wear it or eat it? Don't do it, man. Just say NO."

But he's going anyway. So I'm making the best of it. Evan has agreed to write some guest posts and take photos to document his Tour Across America for us. Evan's adventures, or, as we're calling them, Eventures, will be a weekly feature just like the Friday Five. His first stop: Minot, North Dakota, followed by the exotic metropolis of West Allis, Wisconsin, then stops in Illinois and Minnesota.

What do you want Evan to look for? The tackiest outfit? The largest family? He is not shy, folks. He'll give us what we ask for. We could give him a new challenge for each fair, like a list of questions he has to ask people or words he has to try to get airbrushed onto a T-shirt or things for him to have battered and deep fried! Oooh, hold on, that's good. Those carnies will fry anything if it'll sell. This blog can host Will It Fry? with Evan T. and then put each episode on You Tube and we'll all become internet phenomenons!

Isn't this exciting? We've got our own Ross the Intern! Rupert Gee! Special Correspondent! Field Reporter! So help me stay positive and get on board.


  1. Boy do I have some expectations?! I can't wait to fulfill them though. Thanks so much for the post. I will miss you too LJ! We'll make the best of it though.... one fried Oreo Sunday at a time :)


  2. i want some molestache pics....the dirtiest ones he can find. evan will recieve props if they are sporting cut off jean shorts and flannel or wife beaters.

  3. 1. Piggy Parade- Pictures of the farm animal finalists with captions.

    2. Spot the next Britney- pics of obnoxious kid talent show participants and their aqua netted hair and sash.

    3. Evan across America- Bedazzle/puff paint a tshirt with "Evan was here" (with down arrow) or something and get pics of people wearing it. Or videos of people reciting the same corny line to you, then ending with a cheek kiss.

    4. Most unique craft person of the fair

  4. last time I went to a fair we tried to keep a "mullet tab" but lost count when we all ran out of fingers. I recommend one of those little counter thingys that bus drivers use ...

  5. All good ideas. Evan, you could take the horse head bottle opener and get photographs of it in various places?

  6. I like the creepy moustache idea but I think that we should take it a step further and say that Evan should search for creepy moustaches ON WOMEN. Pictures would be required. Extra points if there is a corn kernel stuck in it.

  7. Start with the girl at Pizza Perfect before you leave. Bleach that thang, beotch!

  8. This is getting INTERESTING! :) Thanks for all the WONDERFUL suggestions. I'll keep them all in mind.


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