Thursday, June 05, 2008


Am I high maintenance?

I was discussing this with a friend the other day. At first, I decided I am not high maintenance. I go out of the house all the time with no makeup on. I don't require a lot of pampering, like regular appointments for highlights or manicures or anything. I don't have to have a certain pillow or mattress nor am I allergic to any foods. Physically, I do not require a lot of maintaining.

But does that automatically mean I'm low maintenance?

I used to think yes, but now I'm starting not to think so anymore. I guess it depends on your definition of low and high maintenance.

I don't think I am easily angered or upset, and have learned to let a lot of things slide. But, when just the right (or wrong?) thing is done or said to push my buttons, I get worked up. I get frustrated or excited or anxious and need calming and reassurance. For example, this week I watched Legally Blonde The Musical: Searching for the next Elle Woods. I wish so badly that I would have tried out for that show. I realized while watching it, I was even more jealous than I get while watching American Idol! So in my pathetic, bitter state ("She's horrible! You call that singing?!"), all I wanted was a hug. And you know what? I'm think that makes me high maintenance.

Or does it?

Take the case of Monica. Rachel and Phoebe tell her she is high maintenance and she doesn't like it. She solicits Chandler's help to prove her point and it backfires:

Monica: Chandler, why don't you tell Phoebe and Rachel what you were telling me earlier about me not being high maintenance?

(Rachel and Phoebe exchange looks.)

Chandler: (starts to recite a rehearsed speech) Monica is a self-sufficient, together lady. (Pause.) Being with her has been like being on a vacation. And what may be perceived as high maintenance is merely attention to detail and—(He falters and Monica prompts him.)—generosity of spirit.

Rachel: Wow, you know what? That is the best fake speech I think I’ve ever heard.

Phoebe: Really? I’ve heard better.

Monica: Wait, wait, he came up with that himself. Tell them, Chandler.

Chandler: (To Monica) I’m out of words. Should I just say the whole thing again?

Monica: Look, I am not high maintenance. I am not. Chandler?!?!

Chandler: (pauses as he struggles with what he has to say) You’re a little high maintenance.

Monica: What?!

Chandler: I’m sorry! You’re not easy-going, but you’re passionate, and that’s good. And when you get upset about the little things, I think that I’m pretty good about making you feel better about that. And that’s good too. So, they can say that you’re high maintenance, but it’s okay, because I like …maintaining you.

Monica: (Happily, to Phoebe and Rachel) I didn’t even tell him to say that!

So what's my point?

I guess I am like Monica. Sometimes I need maintaining; I really like being maintained; and if that makes me high maintenance, then so be it.

Thank you, Chandler.


  1. I saw that show two days ago, too. I can't believe that a few of them got through. I know that I could never be on Broadway, but living through some of those girls for the chance is fun to watch. Just know that I loved your video of singing from "The Little Mermaid"... and I think you are better than those girls wanting to be Elle Woods.

  2. Did you require any prompting for the friends dialogue? I watch a lot of Friends, but that was nice! High maintenance is not a bad thing!!!


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