CRAVING

I cooked last night.

I know, right? It was due, I guess. I even semi-cooked Friday night, if you call making an individual serving of green beans in lemon butter sauce cooking.

Yesterday I got a craving for something balsamic. I've had a really good salad at a restaurant downtown that is walnuts, pears and gorgonzola cheese on lettuce with balsamic grilled chicken and balsamic dressing. So I decided to attempt my own little balsamic stir fry, except nothing but the chicken was being stir fried.

I cut up three chicken tenderloins, poured some olive oil into my pan, some red wine vinegar, a dash of salt and pepper and of course, plenty of balsamic vinegar. I cooked the chicken and then while it cooled, cut up half a pear, which wasn't as sour as I was hoping but oh well. I put the chicken in a bowl, added my pieces of pear, and then sprinkled cheese on top (I thought about grilling the pears but decided against it).

It was really good, I'm not going to lie. I was going to take a picture but I forgot. It did look pretty though, all black and white and green. And it tasted even better. Yum.

Cooking with no recipe? Who knows what I'll do next...

SHIMMERY

Behold: A non-addicting, non-habit forming Jergens lotion (unlike this stuff).

Jergens' Soft Shimmer Lotion is one of my favorite summertime products.

I like it because it's not so much "glittery" as it is "shimmery." Not only does it offer just a little radiance, just a little shine and glow, to accent tanned summer skin without making one look like a stripper with straight up glitter all over her arms and chest, BUT it also has NO SELF TANNER meaning you don't wake up looking like an orange freak.

However, the shimmer can be a little overpowering (depending upon your shimmer preferences) so I always dilute it when I put it on: one part this plus one part regular non-shimmery lotion.

I went to buy some the other day and didn't see any on the shelves at three different stores. "Uh oh," I thought. "My mom and her counterparts have done this product in. No self tanner means no one buys it which means no more product!" But at my third stop, I was relieved to see the lotion's name on the shelf, even if it was all out of stock. I guess we in the non-self-tanning minority have few options and thus our kinds of products tend to run out.

In conclusion, lotions without self-tanner are still to be found in many drugstores and supermarkets nationwide. You just have to look for them (MOM). If you can find it, this is one that I recommend.

CURIOUS

1. My new camera is money in the bank. It's awesome. It's got all kinds of interesting features I am going to have to learn to use. You can swap the colors of items, take a black and white picture with one color showing, and a lot of other crazy things. And good zoom and optics and all that other jazz.

2. If you've been in my room then you've seen the pearl letters I have above my desk (they used to hang above my bed). Yesterday, I saw very similar but smaller versions of the letters in Michael's in one of the dollar bins up front! Can you believe it? Naturally, I bought four: one for me and three for my friends at work, for us to hang on our door (I'm spreading the monogram love). Everyone should go buy one or two or ten. They're only about 4 or 5 inches tall so you will think of lots of places to put yours, at your office or at your home. And did I mention? Only a dollar each!

3. Still can't find my Friends Season 10 disc 3. I'm going to keep blogging about it until it turns up. I opened every DVD case in my cabinet and it's not in my condo. We only have one TV, so there would be no reason for it to go anywhere than the living room unless it was out the door with a friend. I loaned it to someone and he or she has just forgotten. There's no other explanation.... unless - OMG! What if someone broke into my apartment and stole only that DVD because he or she knew it would drive me crazy? It's working, OKAY?!?! Can I have it back now?

4. Please add to the list of things that should be banned in public, right below Heeleys: Bluetooth devices. Honestly. Have you ever seen anyone on one of those and NOT looking totally goofy? But notice what I said here - in public. Use it all you want in your car or at your house if it keeps your hands on the wheel or cleaning your kitchen. But if you come walking toward me in the grocery store, talking 90 to nothing and I can't see your cell phone, it leaves me to assume you are talking to me or the boxes of cereal all around us. And neither the cereal nor I came here to make friends.

5. I have a question for some of you that I really want answers to: what is the most difficult thing you've had to do in your professional career? Think of the hardest, most challenging thing you've had to do since you graduated college and got a job, and tell me about it. Soon I'll tell you why I want to know.

RELIEVED

UPGRADED

Remember me writing about my broken camera and how I was going to have to get it fixed?

Done.

I called Canon on Monday night. I was told I had two choices: pay $100 for a factory refurbished nicer model camera, or pay to ship it to Canon, let them take 5-10 business days to look at it for free and then call me back with the problem, at which point I could choose to pay for repair (which, for a model 3 years old with no warranty, was estimated at $75 + shipping back to me) or I could then decide to pay $100 for that nicer model after hearing what my repairs would cost. I was hesitant to upgrade immediately, so I decided to send it to them for a diagnosis. My hesitation stemmed from a) there was no undoing the deal once I had them process it - all sales final; and b) I was hoping mine was a battery issue (aka cheap). But the Canon man pointed out that the battery wouldn't have charged if that were the case. I know it charged because the LED light on the battery charger said it was ready to go after I charged it Saturday night, so it was more than likely not a battery issue and I was going to have to pay for repair or the new camera.

After I hung up with Canon, I made a quick call to my financial adviser*.

...and then promptly called Canon again.

The SD750 just arrived at my office and the battery is charging right now. But I have to send the old camera to them to recycle (they'll charge me a fee if I don't). So, bye bye old camera. It's been real. You were there for me during all the good times, and I'll never forget how you stepped in and made a painful situation a lot less painful.**

*My sister, who's practically got "Dave Ramsey says" tattooed across her shoulders.
**I had to run out and buy it to avoid being cameraless for two of my best friends' weddings after my first camera was STOLEN the weekend before, which is another post for another time when I am medicated enough to talk about it without getting so angry that my blood pressure rises too high and I am rendered bitter and ineffective for the rest of the day.

DEFENSIVE

I think we all already know I'm a Kanye fan. In fact ya'll would be surprised if you knew how big a Kanye fan I am, but that's another story.

Mr. West was performed at Bonnaroo. Apparently it didn't go well. He was late getting on stage and cut his set short. Personally, I think if you are taking in a concert at 2:30 in the morning then you have much bigger problems than the artist going on stage late, but whatever.

Anyway, Yeezy has gotten a lot of bad publicity for that performance. Of course he's not going to take it lying down. He wrote this on his blog. My comments are italicized in brackets, and other than a little f-bomb editing, I didn't revise this in any way. Sorry about the caps but homeboy was mad.

"I am sick of negative people who just sit around trying 2 plot my downfall… Why???? I understand if people don't like me because I like me [haha] or if people think tight clothes look gay or people say I run my mouth to much, But this Bonnaroo thing is the worst insult I've ever had in my life. This is the most offended I've ever been… this is the maddest I ever will be [really?]. I'm typing so freaking hard I might break my freaking Mac book Air!!!!!!!! Call me any name you want…. arrogant, conceited, narcissistic, racist, metro, fag whatever you can think of…. BUT NEVER SAY I DIDN'T GIVE MY ALL! NEVER SAY I DIDN'T GIVE MY ALL! THIS SHOWS NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY TO BE GOOD AT SOMETHING THERE WILL BE PEOPLE THERE TO LIE ABOUT YOU AND BRING YOU DOWN! LIKE WAYNE SAYS PLEASE DON'T SHOOT ME DOWN CAUSE I'M FLYING! I'M FREAKING HURT BY THIS ONE. ALL I CARE ABOUT ARE THE FANS. JUST SAY THIS OUT LOUD IN A ROOM FULL OF PEOPLE, "KANYE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT GIVING A GOOD PERFORMANCE." CAN ANYONE HONESTLY SAY THAT ????????? HAS ANYONE EVEN TAKEN THE TIME TO AT LEAST DO THE MATH??? BONNAROO SHOULD HAVE RELEASED A STATEMENT IN MY DEFENSE BUT SINCE THEY HAVEN'T LET'S BREAK DOWN THE WALLS ON THIS TRUMAN SHOW AND LET YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY OCCURRED!!! FOR OVER A MONTH WE WENT BACK AND FORTH ON WETHER [sic] OR NOT WE COULD EVEN FIT MY STAGE AT THE FESTIVAL. ONE DAY THEY WOULD SAY YES… WE'D SEND THEM OUR SPECS THEN THEY THEY'D SAY OK… THEN THEY WOULD SEND SPECS BACK THAT DIDN'T FIT THE STAGE. WE WERE OBVIOUSLY DEALING WITH FREAKING IDIOTS WHO DIDN'T REALLY HAVE THE CAPACITY TO REALLY PUT ON THIS SHOW PROPERLY. THEY TRIED 2 GIVE ME A TIME SLOT WERE IT WAS STILL LIGHT OUTSIDE … I HAVE A FREAKING LIGHT SHOW DUMB ASS, IT'S NOT CALLED GLOW IN THE DARK FOR NO REASON SQUID BRAINS! MY PEOPLE WORKED OUT A COMPROMISED STAGE PLOT AND A 3AM TIME SLOT AND I AGREED. FAST FOWARD [sic] TO THE DAY OF THE SHOW. MY PRODUCTION MANAGER TRIED TO LOAD IN FOR 24 HOURS BEFORE I WENT ON STAGE BUT THE FESTIVAL WOULDN'T ALLOW US TO DO ANYTHING UNTIL PEARL JAM LEFT THE STAGE. PEARL JAM ENDED ONE HOUR
LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AT THAT POINT WE'RE RACING AGAINST THE SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AT 4:20AM DON COMES BACK 2 THE BUS AND TELLS ME, " IT WOULD TAKE 45 MORE MINUTES TO PUT ALL YOUR PYRO IN!" I SAY I HAVE TO GET OUT THERE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE . I HIT THE STAGE AND PEOPLE HAD BEEN THROWING SHIT ON THE STAGE AND HAD ACTUALLY HIT THE JANE SCREEN WITH, I GUESS BOTTLES OR SOMETHING AND HAD BROKEN MY FREAKING SCREEN. REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE A SHORTY AND WATER WOULD HIT THE TV?????? WHEN I GOT 2 "THROUGH THE WIRE" I STEPPED ON THE FRONT PART OF MY STAGE AND THERE WAS SO MUCH LIQUID ON THE STAGE I COULDN'T MOVE WITHOUT SLIPPING. I HAD TO ADJUST MY WHOLE PERFORMANCE STYLE BECAUSE OF IT. A FEW MORE SONGS IN AND THE SUN WAS ON IT'S WAY UP.. I CUT A FEW SONGS FROM THE SET BECAUSE I WANTED PEOPLE 2 EXPERIENCE STRONGER WHILE THERE WAS STILL SOME DARKNESS TO PERFORM IT IN. I'VE STRUGGLED WITH STRONGER FROM IT'S CONCEPTION. REMEMBER LAST SUMMER WHEN I CANCELED SOME TV APPEARANCES. IT WAS BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO PERFORM STRONGER IN THE DAYTIME. ANYONE WHO CAME TO THE GLOW TOUR CAN UNDERSTAND WHY I WANTED PEOPLE TO SEE IT PROPERLY [it's very laser heavy, to say the least]. IT BROKE MY HEART THAT I COULDN'T GIVE THESE FANS STRONGER IN IT'S GREATEST FORM… BY THE TIME I GOT TO STRONGER IT WAS DAYTIME AND IT BROKE MY HEART. I'M SORRY TO EVERYONE THAT I DIDN'T HAVE THE ABILITY 2 GIVE THE PERFORMANCE I WANTED TO. I'M SORRY… SOMETIMES I GO 2, 3 DAYS W/O SLEEP WORKING ON MY PERFORMANCE… I HAVE TO ICE MY KNEES AFTER EVERY SHOW [I believe it] AND THEY HURT WHEN I WALK THROUGH THE AIRPORT… HAVING AN EXPENSIVE STAGE CUTS MY PAYDAY IN HALF… CALL ME WHAT YOU WANT BUT NEVER SAY I DIDN'T GIVE MY ALL!!!"

You know what I think the problem was? Not the stage, not the load in, not the sun. The problem was that he even played Bonnaroo in the first place! Whose idea was that? That's like inviting Shania Twain to perform at the BET Awards. People that like Pearl Jam and Metallica, not just casually but are diehard enough to stay up all odd hours and go without sleep and showers to see them perform, typically don't also like a lot of rap. And vice versa. You can be a hippy or you can be a thug but you can't be both.

So you see, Kanye, you should have just performed at the Sommett Center at a reasonable hour instead of at Bonnaroo at 2:15 a.m. Then I could have come to see you again, and then afterward gone home to take a shower and sleep in my bed. The crowd wasn't mad at you, Kanye. They were tired and sleep deprived and stinky and mad at themselves for coming back to Bonnaroo when they swore after last year's festival they were done.

And the other problem? They weren't there to see you. You've sold out arenas all across the United States, full of ticket-wielding Kanye addicts like myself who appreciate your art and your talent and will drive hundreds of miles just to see YOU perform... twice! But those kids at Bonnaroo were far more interested in getting high and jamming with Eddie Vetter, and anyone that told you otherwise was lying.

But don't worry, Kanye. I still love you. I know you gave your all; you always do and you always will. So you've still got at least one fan in Tennessee. XOXOXO.

P.S.: Meant to show y'all this e-mail I got on my birthday. It was my second favorite birthday card.

PARADIDDLED

I FINALLY got to go to tap class last night. It was SO fun. I encourage all of you to find the community arts programs in your city (try through the parks and rec department) and find some kind of class to take. Even if only to blog about it.

Allison came over to my house before class to show me the steps to the dance "sequence" that they learned last week. It was fairly basic, in fact, I learned it while eating my dinner. I changed into shorts and we headed off to class.

The Community Arts Center is a brightly decorated kid-friendly facility. We had to sign in, and then walk through a ballet class to get to Studio C. Next stop, Tappsville. There was a jazz class going on beside us, too.

Our instructor and two classmates were stretching on the floor when we walked in. Nadine. our teacher, looked to be at least in her forties. She was wearing wing tipped tap shoes, so I knew she meant business. The two students were both in their teens, and then another older woman joined us as we started class. Five students total.

Nadine started us off with some warm up moves, then we put those to music. The first few songs we tapped to were all songs I performed with the jazz band in high school, including "Paper Moon" and "Don't Get Around Much Anymore." So when I wasn't tapping, I was singing. Or dancing.

We moved to the bar to learn some sequential steps created by a famous tapper named Al Gilbert (he taught Annette Funicello and Michael Jackson). They start off easy, with just fa-lap ball changes, then we had to spin toward the bar and do them facing the other way. That was a little tricky. We would repeat one step for a while, then add a heel, a hop, a step, a toe and eventually, all of the above, until we had a whole 8-count of flapping and hopping and stepping then spinning to do it all over again.

We moved away from the bar and back to the center of the floor where Nadine announced she not only couldn't remember the song our dance "sequence" went to, but she didn't remember the dance "sequence" itself. Luckily, I knew for a fact that Allison remembered the dance "sequence" as she had just taught it to me 30 minutes earlier, so once Nadine remembered music, I offered that Allison remembered the dance "sequence." So of course Nadine had Allison perform it to the music ("Crazy Little Thing Called Love"). She did wonderfully and I led a round of applause when she was finished.

We reviewed the dance "sequence" and then learned some new traveling steps that would go next in our dance "sequence." After practicing them a few times to the music and adding them to the end of our dance "sequence," Nadine taught us a few other traveling steps. This is where class got really exciting. We learned a step called a Front Irish. It gets that name because it looks like Irish step dancing (your feet cross in front of you a la Riverdance). After we practiced our Front Irishes a few times, Nadine corralled us all into the back corner of Studio C. From there, we were to travel across the room to the opposite front corner, wait in the back corner on that side of the room, and travel across the room again to the front corner. The other students, having learned the ways of tap class without me last week, lined up behind me so they wouldn't have to go first. Bullies. So I was the line leader without even realizing it until Nadine turned on some music and nodded at me. We were to do two flap ball changes followed by two Front Irishes, over and over again, all the way across the room. Off I went, arms a-swinging: fa-lap ball change, fa-lap ball change, shuf-fle hop step, shuf-fle hop step. Fa-lap ball change, fa-lap ball change, shuf-fle hop step, shuf-fle hop step. I was pretty good.

We huddled in the corner until it was time to prance back across the room. Nadine threw us a curve ball: "start on your LEFT foot!" I repeated the steps back across the room, this time leading with my left foot, with little problems. In fact, I'm surprised the Rockettes haven't already called me.

Nadine had us travel the room twice more and then, with one minute left in the class, taught us one fun extra step. Apparently she'd promised one of our classmates she'd teach it to us last night. It's called a Paradiddle. Heel, drag, toe, step. Heel, drag, toe, step. Heel, drag, toe, step. You're switching feet after each step. "Par-a-did-dle, par-a-did-dle," Nadine chanted, keeping rhythm while we practiced. I looked at Allison and decided to keep my own rhythm while I paradiddled: "Lind-say [Last Name], Lind-say [Last Name]." It works just as well as "par-a-did-dle."

I paradiddled over to my flip flops and changed out of my tap shoes. If Legally Blonde hadn't been coming on and Evan hadn't have been waiting on me at my house, I would have stayed after class and tapped my heart out. I loved the sound of all those taps click clacking on the wooden floors. I can't wait to go back next week!

DOCUMENTED

Thanks for my birthday phone calls and well wishes on Saturday. I was happy to hear from so many people, and I had so much fun with my awesome Saturday night celebration delegation (Allison, Jason, Carrie and Leslie).

One sad bit of news: my camera broke Friday night. One minute I was taking pictures, and the next minute the camera was permanently turned off. Game over. I charged the battery Saturday, but the camera will not turn on no matter what. I was able to save all my pictures off of my memory card, but I didn't even get to use it on my birthday night (thankfully my friends took plenty of pictures... and video). So it's time to call Canon, and fast, because my first tap class (Allison's second) is tonight and I know you're all dying to see pictures and/or video of that.

But until my friends e-mail me those pictures, this is all I have to document my birthday weekend: the lovely Carrie* and me** at Aerial on Friday night (and yes, these were taken with someone else's perfectly functional camera):

*She's single, boys!
**Hair is actually shorter than it appears.

PANTIFIED

So the funniest thing happened while out for my birthday yesterday.

Four of us were walking down the street, heading toward the bar after making a trip to my car. I was on my phone (aka - distracted) and had just handed it to someone else when I felt something around my foot. I was accidentally kicking or dragging something down the street with me.

At the same time, all four of us realized what it was: PANTIES.

I had a pair of panties wrapped around my foot.

SERIOUSLY?

I screamed and kicked them away and we all doubled over laughing.

My first thought: GROSS!
My second thought: Hey, those looked kind of familiar...
My third thought: Hmm, I wore these jeans out last night, too...

By the time we got to the bar, we had decided that those were in fact my undies. I guess they were lodged in my jeans and decide to shimmy down my leg to reveal themselves at that perfect moment, with plenty of people nearby. It was SO funny. And now I can say that I got so nutty on my 25th birthday that my underwear ended up on the streets of downtown Nashville.

TWENTY FIVE

To save you all some time, I took the liberty of preselecting some ecards that seemed appropriate. Send at will:

LAZY

1. TOMORROW IS THE BIG DAY! I am so excited. Gifts have been delivered and the celebrations have started, including a nice dinner and a COOKIE CAKE. Yes, my very own cookie cake.

2. I took today off of work. I slept in, ate cookie cake when I woke up, and was going to lay out but decided not to because it's so overcast. Instead, I have been at my computer fixing my iTunes and pricing out the vacation I want to take.

3. I am behind on So You Think You Can Dance! Who is good? Which routines do I need to see?

4. Y'all should see my haircut. I got it cut on Saturday (after "growing it out" for a while) and it is short. Like, Katie Holmes short. Or Suri, depending on how I fix it. A week later, I am still getting used to it but it's getting rave reviews from buddies and the order taker at Bar-B-Cutie. Only thing is I can't wear it curly so much anymore. Oh well.

5. I saw a real live black bear on my business trip this week. It was SO cute. It wasn't a cub but didn't look full grown. A medium sized bear. That I named Anthony. I wanted to keep him, but decided if I didn't have room for a cat then a bear would definitely be out of the question.

SPOILED

NEWS FLASH. I think I have solved the mystery of the birthday obsession.

Birthdays 24, 23 and 22 were spent at work. 21 was in Auburn between camp sessions. 20 was in Etna, California. 19 was in Birmingham. 18 was at Camp War Eagle.

17, 16, 15 and 14 were spent at cheerleading camp. And I'm pretty sure that's where I got my birthday obsession.

Trust me, there are few situations that could out-do spending your birthday at a cheerleading camp. Talk about some birthday spirit and enthusiasm. 400 peppy cheerleaders telling you happy birthday all day? Your squad decorating your room/door on your special day? Getting called up on stage to be sung to each year? It was awesome. And, now I realize, spoiled me rotten.

Sidebar: cheerleading camp. Did you love it or hate it? I loved it. I got my first taste of college. Living in the dorms for a week with my best friends, staying up late and talking in each other's rooms? Playing pranks on each other like the time we hid Mary Lauren into a suitcase and took her up and down the elevator scaring people? Yes the days were long and hot, but it sure was fun.

Maybe I will write more about cheer camp memories another day (there are plenty) but for now I bring it up to mention this: one of the things cheerleaders always do when en masse is to circle up and start singing. No, I don't mean a calm rendition of "Kumbaya." Rather, something snappy and upbeat to which dancing, jumping or even stunting could commence.

Now I know there are plenty of new readers to this blog. And plenty of not new readers who are still anonymous. So because for four years, I would be at cheer camp during the days surrounding my birthday (which is in 3 days!), and because I want to know who I'm partying with, we're going to circle up and do this cheerleader style. Introduce yourself! Tell us about your blog or where you're from or something. Anything.

Help me out Sarah, Cierra, Little Liz, Candace, Laurie, Katie, Natalie... I know there are lots of former cheerleaders (and mascots) reading this. I'll start!

Jump IN! Jump OUT! And introduce yourself! Jump IN! Jump OUT! And introduce yourself!

My name is Lindsay... (YEAH?!)
I love my BlackBerry... (YEAH?!)
And I want a cat! (YEAH?! Alright, alright, alright.)

Jump IN! Jump OUT! And introduce yourself! I said, Jump IN! Jump OUT! And introduce yourself!



If this goes, next we'll do Little Sally Walker.

LONELY

Happy Father's Day.If they were still here, they'd be the ones getting a card today.

TAGGED

Megan at A Life's Design tagged me for the following questionnaire:

1. What was I doing ten years ago?
In June 1998 I had just finished my freshman year of high school, I was on round 2 of 3 with Gray and I didn't shave my legs. My friends would be getting their driver's permits soon and I had switched from cheering from basketball to football. Life was good.

2. Five items on your to-do list:
1, Deposit my Economic Stimulus Rebate check
2. Pack for business trip
3. Get birthday plans together
4. Take a check to Allison to hold my spot in tap class
5. Update songs on my iPod

3. Snacks I enjoy:
Uhhh how long can I make this answer before looking like a glutton? Well, I would be embarrassed to tell you how long the tub of low-fat ranch dip that I bought on Sunday lasted. Or didn't last. So, obviously, without fail, chips and dip. And ice cream. And pita chips with hummus. And cheese. And cucumbers. And pretzels. And goldfish. And animal crackers. And fruit. And COOKIE CAKE. But not all at once.

4. What would you do if you were a billionaire?
How funny, I was just discussing this the other day. I would finance my own country music album, buy a really cool house and outfit it to the nines, hire a chef (sorry), buy a new car, take LOTS of vacations (another whole post in itself), set up a scholarship/donate to Auburn, plus all the normal stuff like give it away and buy stuff for my family and save it and tithe it.

5. Places I have lived:
Birmingham, Auburn, Etna, CA and Nashville

6. Bloggers I am passing the challenge onto: Lauren Train, Katie Price and Liz Hard, because they have new blogs and probably haven't already done this.

BRIEF

1. Guess who will be out of town again ALL OF NEXT WEEK. Yes, this girl. So don't expect a whole lot of blog posts, though I did write one that thanks to Blogger's "scheduler" will show up sometime next week while I am gone. How crazy is that?! So look forward to reading that and not much else. But trust me, you probably prefer it that way because the countdown is ON for my birthday (8 days!), during which there's not much else I like to talk (or blog) about. Unless it's missing my first tap class: a subject on which I will gladly share my displeasure.

2. Anyone want an update on the potential good news that I was alluding to earlier this week? Me too. But you'll have to keep waiting though, because the only news I got this week is that I won't know something until next week and like I already wrote, I'll be away from a computer!

3. This week's tough decision: New Kids on the Block concert in DC with my sister, or Auburn v. Vandy game in Nashville?

4. I am getting a haircut tomorrow. Yay and thank heavens. My hair has gotten out of control. I got it cut right after the half marathon but it feels like it hasn't been cut since January.

5. New addiction: Scrabulous on Facebook. Anyone want to play?

HAIRY

I hate shaving.

There, I said it.

In junior high, I twisted my ankle. The doctor that saw me at the after hours clinic called me Spike because my legs were not smooth.

In high school, I worked as a camp counselor every summer. One day we were having a staff meeting and this guy and I sat down indian-style beside each other and our knees brushed, He recoiled in shock. The sad part is that I know it couldn't have been that bad. It was in the summer and I was wearing shorts: three days growth MAX. "Get over it," I said to him. "A lot of girls don't shave everyday." He looked horrified. "You don't!?!?" "No way!" "Whatever. My wife will shave everyday because that--" (pointed to my knee) "--is disgusting." He's married now. Wonder if he's getting his way.

My friends, roommates, perhaps even coworkers who have sat close to me in meetings know that I am not one of those everyday-shaving breed of women. It's way too time consuming because we girls have a lot of surface area to cover.

However, I have a friend who has signed up* for permanent laser hair removal on his back. It's a year and a half long process (though I'm not sure if that is the standard). If it goes well, I really might consider getting it on my legs done one day. I mean, it's a time-saving investment. You can't put a price on extra time.

But until then, surely I am not the only one who doesn't shave her legs everyday. Right?

And while we're at it, if anyone has strong thoughts on Lasik surgery, please feel free to share. Maybe I should save for that before the laser leg hair removal. Maybe they can do both at once.

*By 'signed up', I mean 'is getting for free'. Damn twin study.

HOLDING

So, I got some news. And not just from Uncle Sam. But, the news is not final or definite or in stone. Just encouraging, promising and hopeful. After two days of discouragement, it was more than enough to boost my spirits. So stay tuned.

However, things have been pretty hectic. Birthdays, work, impromptu tap dance practice and deep conversations have all taken a backseat to the blog the past few days. Have you noticed? So in the mean time, let me suggest something for you newer readers: click here. That is the list of the "best" posts on this blog. Some of my funnier tales and favorite stories that you may not have read (and if you've been around for a while, you can laugh all over again). There's 36 of them (make sure to click older posts at the bottom of the page) so if you're really new, that should shave at least an hour and a half off your workday.

Knock yourselves out!

STIMULATED

Well I did get some good news yesterday but it wasn't the good news I was expecting.

I got a notice from the IRS reporting that my Economic Stimulus Rebate was on its way to my mailbox, and the check would be for $600.

Now that may not be a surprise to some of you but a few months ago some friends told me that the checks were for up to $600 each. I would have been brokenhearted if my check had been for $100 or so. But I had no idea what to expect.

So imagine my elation when I flip over the notice and see $600 staring back at me.

Now here's the real question: what am I going to do with it?

I know, I know. Put it in my savings account, to be used toward a new car or new home. That's probably what I'll do. But just for fun, what else could I do with it?

Take a vacation? Yes, but where? To the beach or NYC or Vegas? Buy myself a kickass birthday present, like a "right hand ring" or some real pearls? Buy that pretty new bedroom furniture?

The ideas are infinite. Unfortunately, the money is not.

BLITHE

What a fantastic weekend! let's review:

On Friday night, I went back to the CMA Fest for what was unarguably the best of the four nightly concerts. We got there in time to see Lady Antebellum take the stage, followed by an amazing show from Miranda Lambert, followed by an even more amazing show from Carrie Underwood, followed by a so-so Josh Turner, followed by a good show by Faith Hill, followed by a good show by Keith Urban. We felt like we'd already gotten our money's worth by the time Keith Urban rolled around, so we didn't stick around for his whole set.

Before I describe the concerts, I am proud to announce that I am a CHAMP at Redneck Bingo. A tour t-shirt, jorts, fanny packs, etc. Seriously. Anyone who'd like to challenge me, bring it on.

Now about the shows, here's what I think - Miranda Lambert: awesome. She's adorable and sings (and plays) her heart out. Carrie Underwood: perfection. Homegirl was absolutely flawless for each of the several songs she sang. Josh Turner: entertaining. I'm a fan. Faith Hill: high as a kite and looked ridiculous. But she has an incredible voice so I will overlook the clouded judgment - literally - in wardrobe and hair.

Whomever is in charge of the CMAs needs to make sure to spread out all the super popular acts among the four nightly concerts. For instance: tonight's big names to close the festival? Randy Travis and Dwight Yoakam. Last night? Kenny Rogers. I'm sorry, what? Who? Put a positive spin on it all you want, but there is a reason Dwight Yoakam hasn't performed at CMA Fest in 20 years - it's cause no one likes him anymore! He should have been tossed into the mix on Friday and Carrie or Faith saved to close out tonight. But maybe that's just me.

Saturday afternoon, my roommate and I spent a couple of hours in the sun at the YMCA pool. It wasn't too crowded and I'm looking forward to going back lots more this summer. Especially because there's a TCBY conveniently across the street!

Saturday p.m. brought dinner (Macaroni Grill) and a movie (Kung Fu Panda). Now here's my question. How many people have to stop by your table to ask what on earth are you eating because it looks so delicious and I absolutely have to order it before Macaroni Grill takes your Make Your Own Pasta Bowl concoction and puts it on their menu as Pasta a la Lindsay? Because if it's at least two, then look out Rachael Ray. Macaroni Grill brings you a notepad and you check off all the things you want for your pasta, right? So I check penne pasta + grilled chicken + pesto + sun-dried tomatoes + pine nuts and then - here's the key - made my own little check box for CHEESE and then checked it with a big fat check and underlined it three times just for good measure. Y'all - it was so good I wanted to stop by my own table and ask myself about it! They have not seen the last of me or my pasta at the Opry Mills Macaroni Grill, that's for sure.

Then, like I said, we went to see Kung Fu Panda on the IMAX screen. It was super cute and funnier than I expected and I recommend it if you like animals, humor, Disney, Pixar or happiness in general.

Which brings me to today. First I went to the mall and spent an hour trying on swimsuits. I intentionally have avoided doing this since about 2005. However, I actually found a few that I liked. One suit in particular I was ready to buy until I realized it was a) a halter top, and I already have two of those from Target, and buying that style would defeat the whole reason I went swimsuit shopping in the first place (glutton for punishment get a new style for tanning purposes); and b) a little pricey to not have anywhere to wear it besides the YMCA. So I left empty handed. Actually I left even more empty handed than I had arrived. I realized after I'd already left that my one of my favorite pearl earrings had fallen out while I was in the dressing room. It was fake but it was my favorite set. So I guess that effectively prioritizes my birthday list.

Speaking of priorities, I have lots of friendswho are in the middle of decorating a home (Katie and Jenn are two of them) . I am sad I'm not there yet because I am a mere renter and don't want to invest a lot of time or money into anything I can't take with me when I move out.

But I have been needing to get organized in a few places, one of which is under my bathroom sink. Prior to today, I had two small clear plastic tubs that became a catchall for everything bathroomish rather than a designated spot for my contact solution, toothpaste, etc., to go so that I wouldn't leave it all on my sink counter. Things were beginning to pile up and I couldn't take it, so I have been basket hunting for about a month now.

Today hit the jackpot with a trip to TJMaxx and WalMart. First, I bought a pair of larger, taller basket from TJ Maxx for $7 each. In one went my hair straightener, hair dryer, brush and hair products; in the other, toilet paper and... um... other paper type products.
Then at WalMart, I found two smaller baskets:
What I think the good folks at WalMart intended to be a flatware basket for a lovely summer picnic (it's a wicker "utility basket" from the crafts department so maybe it could hold knitting supplies instead of forks, I don't know - the point is, it's getting neither), I have turned into a perfect storage solution for the products I use in my low maintenance daily regime. I have a place for my toothpaste and floss, my rubber bands and bobby pins, my contact solution and case, and for the deodorant, lotion, etc. There's a place for everything (except my toothbrush and glasses, who live on the sink counter in a little stand). The second small basket I got from WalMart now holds all my extras: razors, mouthwash, boxes of soap, hand mirror, band-aids, etc. Here you can see how the whole set looks together. Organized, effective, perfect.
And yes, it drives me crazy that they're all not the same weave or color but I can't win em all. OH. Maybe I will spray paint them. Yes. That is totally what Jenn or Katie would do. Problem solved.

So there's everything you ever wanted to know about my weekend and my bathroom sink. Have I gone too far? Shared too much? It wouldn't be the first time. But speaking of sharing things, I find out some news tomorrow and I really, really want it to be good news. It has to be. I don't even know what would happen if it's not. So say some prayers and cross your fingers for me.

CONFUSED

1. My very first CMA Fest experience was a great one. We found ourselves in the official CMA Lounge which meant free refreshments and good seats (CMA Lounge = press box). Tonight is going to be even better, not just because of the artist lineup, but because we will be playing Redneck Bingo. That's right. We each get an index card with a list of things to find/look for and whomever gets the most by the end of the night, or finds them all first, wins a prize. Items that are on the list so far: Woman in Bikini Top, Man in Jorts, Mullet, Neck Tattoo, anything Lynyrd Skynyrd, etc. Leave suggestions if you've got them.
2. Add this to the birthday list... more office decor maybe? Can't think of where I would put it in my home.

3. Something is really wrong with me today - my attention span has gone to hell. I feel dizzy and spinny and over-energized. At lunch I could not look at something for more than 2 seconds. Yes, I'm anxious about something but I've been anxious before and know what that feels like. This is not anxiety, this feels like a chemically altered state of mind. I think someone slipped speed in my drink when I wasn't looking. Therefore you only get three facts instead of the usual Friday Five (or Friday Fifty like last week) because I cannot look at the screen long enough to think of two more things I need to tell you other than I need to go home and lie down.

SHOED

Yesterday, Allison and I went to buy our tap shoes for the tap class we are taking this summer.

I don't know what kind of tap shoe you expected us to buy. An elegant high-heeled number? Sleek, classy and professional just like a real live Radio City Rockette? Something along these lines, perhaps: Yeah, not so much. Don't get me wrong. We tried on some of those shoes. They are just too expensive. Neither of us wanted to pay more for the tap shoes than we were paying for the class.

There were so many options! High heeled! Slip ons! Lace ups! Soft upper! Mary Janes! How would we choose?
The lace ups and slip ons were quickly ruled out, as they made me look like I'd been taking fashion advice from Queen Elizabeth (don't miss the ankle footies):
Allison trying on one of the nicer pairs:
At this point, I notice the lady has been bringing out nothing but the $50 and $60 shoes. Good thing we'd done our homework. I mean, do we look like fools? (Correct answer: not yet.)

"Do you have any of the $30 ones in stock? There were some on your web site that we are interested in." She got up to check. She had them in Allison's size but not mine:
She called her other stores. I was very disappointed when she got off the phone and told us that no other stores had the shoes in my size. I was sad but too engrossed in showing Allison how to do a faLAP to notice the saleslady had disappeared back into the stock room.

With a flourish, she returned. "I think I have something you'll like - in both your sizes," she announced with a grin on her face. She opened the boxes, and pulled out these:
All together now: ooooooooooh! Aahhhhhhhhhh!

It was love at first sight. They are so tacky that they are beautiful. Pristine, just like the white skates you always wanted as a child but your mom never got you. And most importantly, they were pretty cheap too. She gave us a deal on them, very likely because she knew there are no other adults in the state of Tennessee that would ever buy white patent leather tap shoes, and it was now or never to make the sale.

We may even go buy some different colored grosgrain ribbon to change out with the white ribbon you see in the picture. Pink? Green? PLAID? Who even knows.

Unfortunately, it looks like I will be missing our first tap class. But if one class is nearly as exciting as buying shoes was, this is going to be a hilarious summer.

And just for fun, here's the follow up conversation between Allison and me this morning:
A: Did you try and break in your shoes last night?
L: A little bit.
A: I think that my feet grew by the time I got home. They seemed a little tight.
L: I put them on with my pompom socks and the socks are too thick.
A: Pompom socks?! I bet that was HOT. J could barely keep his hands off me when I was wearing mine. JK. He told me I looked like a moron.
L: Are you serious?
A: He is just jealous.
L: Hahahahhaha!
A: But I did have my pants rolled up to my knees and knee socks on so I did look stupid.
L: But did you tell him how much money you saved?!?!
A: Yes, he did like that.

MAINTAINED

Am I high maintenance?

I was discussing this with a friend the other day. At first, I decided I am not high maintenance. I go out of the house all the time with no makeup on. I don't require a lot of pampering, like regular appointments for highlights or manicures or anything. I don't have to have a certain pillow or mattress nor am I allergic to any foods. Physically, I do not require a lot of maintaining.

But does that automatically mean I'm low maintenance?

I used to think yes, but now I'm starting not to think so anymore. I guess it depends on your definition of low and high maintenance.

I don't think I am easily angered or upset, and have learned to let a lot of things slide. But, when just the right (or wrong?) thing is done or said to push my buttons, I get worked up. I get frustrated or excited or anxious and need calming and reassurance. For example, this week I watched Legally Blonde The Musical: Searching for the next Elle Woods. I wish so badly that I would have tried out for that show. I realized while watching it, I was even more jealous than I get while watching American Idol! So in my pathetic, bitter state ("She's horrible! You call that singing?!"), all I wanted was a hug. And you know what? I'm think that makes me high maintenance.

Or does it?

Take the case of Monica. Rachel and Phoebe tell her she is high maintenance and she doesn't like it. She solicits Chandler's help to prove her point and it backfires:

Monica: Chandler, why don't you tell Phoebe and Rachel what you were telling me earlier about me not being high maintenance?

(Rachel and Phoebe exchange looks.)

Chandler: (starts to recite a rehearsed speech) Monica is a self-sufficient, together lady. (Pause.) Being with her has been like being on a vacation. And what may be perceived as high maintenance is merely attention to detail and—(He falters and Monica prompts him.)—generosity of spirit.

Rachel: Wow, you know what? That is the best fake speech I think I’ve ever heard.

Phoebe: Really? I’ve heard better.

Monica: Wait, wait, he came up with that himself. Tell them, Chandler.

Chandler: (To Monica) I’m out of words. Should I just say the whole thing again?

Monica: Look, I am not high maintenance. I am not. Chandler?!?!

Chandler: (pauses as he struggles with what he has to say) You’re a little high maintenance.

Monica: What?!

Chandler: I’m sorry! You’re not easy-going, but you’re passionate, and that’s good. And when you get upset about the little things, I think that I’m pretty good about making you feel better about that. And that’s good too. So, they can say that you’re high maintenance, but it’s okay, because I like …maintaining you.

Monica: (Happily, to Phoebe and Rachel) I didn’t even tell him to say that!

So what's my point?

I guess I am like Monica. Sometimes I need maintaining; I really like being maintained; and if that makes me high maintenance, then so be it.

Thank you, Chandler.

WISHY (part 2)

So, I got put on blast for only listing bland, practical things for my birthday wish list. Point taken. Here are some splurges in case a bedroom suite or a broom is a little too vanilla for what you expect from me:

1. I don't think I'd turn down another Lacoste. Once I bought one last summer, I practically lived in it... until I bought another one. Short Sleeve Retro Fit, see me for color and sizing information.

2. I want one of these framed monogram wall art pieces (me? display my monogram? SHOCKING). Problem is, I don't know which one. The Green Lattice or Green Stripes would be easiest to incorporate into a room or kitchen or office... but not my bedroom. That's okay, Lord knows there's enough monogrammed stuff in there already.

3. Now here's something I really really do want: they charge an arm and a leg for the official pictures from the half marathon. Since I need my legs and arms in case I want to do another one, I haven't bought any pictures yet. But if you don't plan on running any races and could spare an arm or leg, take note! My favorite is 31330-3009-004. $79 gets a whole CD of all the pictures, $35 buys the digital rights to one picture, and $20 buys two 4x6's of any one picture. They say these pictures expire on June 16. Wonder if that's true.

4. I saw a really cool set of funky stackable rings in Forever 21 or Love 21 or whatever that jewelry store in the Cool Springs mall is called. They weren't my size so I didn't get them. But they were cool. Maybe some stacky rings would be a good splurge.

5. I have a purse from Target that I carry around everyday but it's start to look a little shoddy. The fake leather has gotten ripped and the stitching has started to unravel in some places. Is it time to get a new, genuine leather, big girl purse? Maybe so.

Okay, I'm spent. That is all I can think of that I could possibly, ever want for my birthday that is purchasable (besides the two things I'll ALWAYS want: a new car or an all-expenses paid vacation).

HOPEFUL

Yesterday's fortune from my fortune cookie at Pei Wei: Doors will be opening for you in many areas of your life.

The lucky word? Today.


Hmmm. I'm not saying, I'm just saying.

STOKED

So many highlights from the weekend!

• Had a great run Thursday afternoon - feels good to be back at it after a month of laziness
• Got an exciting phone call Friday afternoon
• Lovely dinner at the Cheesecake Factory for Mom's 50th
• Delicious breakfast at Casa de Bonds on Saturday morning
• Got an exciting e-mail Saturday morning
• Surprised Mom with a party on Saturday afternoon
• Drove to Auburn for a wedding Saturday night
• Got my first birthday present Sunday morning (working on my updated list, P.S.)

And the week has only just begun! I get to celebrate another birthday AND go to CMA Fest for the first time ever AND now it's June which means it's time for my birthday! Woohoo!