Friday, November 30, 2007

RETIRED

Vera Bradley strikes again.

Even though my "pattern" is just one year old, they're already retiring it!

Not that I want anything else by Vera, but if I did, my window of opportunity is about to close. That makes me mad. What if I decide in one year or five that I want more luggage or pajama pants or hangers or file folders in my Capri Melon pattern? I'd just like to have the option. But Vera is taking that away from me.

And after only a year!

It was fun while it lasted, Vera. But I just can't be with someone who is that commitmentphobic. I gave you a chance, but now it's over.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

TRUTHFUL

Dear Aveda Shampoo and Conditioner,

Let's be honest here. While I appreciate the effect you have on my hair, I really buy you for your smell.

Love,
L

Monday, November 26, 2007

FLUSHED

Over Thanksgiving, my family and I were discussing hearing loss. My uncle was showing off his new hearing aids which reminded me of a hilarious story that it turns out no one in my family knew about.

My grandad always had hearing problems. He wore the large, beige hearing aids that wrapped around each ear.

One time when I was staying at my grandparents' house, I accidentally knocked them into the toilet.

He had left them on the sink counter, which was right beside the toilet, which I was using. When I stood, turned and reached to flush, I accidentally knocked them in. I pulled the handle before I realized what I did and so as the water started swirling, I knew I had to get them out or face some serious wrath.

So I quickly fished them out (almost missed one of them) and washed them off. I thought I told my grandmother, but surely she'd have told the rest of the family, so maybe I was smart and just kept the whole thing to myself.

But apparently, if those get wet they are ruined. So maybe that's why Pawpaw never could hear well. Oops. Sorry Pawpaw.

DETERMINED

Leaf Three:

For the past two years since I left Auburn, I've felt slightly unproductive. Even with a job, I have struggled with finding a purpose because I don't have a goal. You work toward high school graduation, then toward college graduation, and then the funnel flips upside down. Everything is yours for the taking. And while I've taken some fun activities in the past two years, I still feel like I am just spinning my wheels with not much to show for it.

So I've selected a goal. A goal bigger than myself, doing good for someone other than myself. A goal that will take a lot of work and a very long, painful process to achieve it. Something to keep me focused, something to work toward, something that will feel like a true accomplishment. And the icing on the cake - I am helping others in the process.

I'm running a half-marathon.

Yes, you read that correctly.

I'm running the Music City Half Marathon in April, and I've joined Team in Training and we're rasing money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. I've known a few people with these blood cancer diseases as well as plenty of people that have battled other forms of cancer and lost. My grandfather, for starters. Actually, I checked to see if the American Cancer Society had a team traning program but they don't in this state. So my next choice was LLS. So that's why this is bigger than just me. With each step and each dollar raised, I'm helping someone who has faced the horrible reality of a life-threatening disease.

I'm a few weeks into our training process and it's hard. I am a sleeper, not a runner. Getting up at 6 a.m. on Saturdays is not my style. But it's a good change.

Like I said, I am raising money with my team. My goal is nearly $2000. I would love it if my blog readers can help me meet this goal. I wouldn't even beg you guys to comment anymore. Click here to make your contribution online. And remember that none of this money is going in my pocket, it's going to the LLS. But each little dollar will feel like a vote of confidence that I can do this. Or, you can also just leave a comment to cast your vote of confidence and that will mean a lot, too. Oops, I said I wasn't going to ask for comments anymore. Starting NOW.

"Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it." I think that will be the case as training intensifies over the next few months (although I really look forward to crossing that finish line). There's a lot of potential lessons for a non-runner like me to learn along the way. Starting with why I'm really doing this. Obviously, raising money is a good incentive. But that's not what got me to the meeting in the first place. For me to say, "I think I'll train for then run 13.1 miles" is equally crazy as me saying "I think I'll sprout wings and fly." It's very out of my comfort zone. If I'm being honest, I'm very unconfident in myself and whether or not I can do this. I know what I'm good at, and running isn't on the short list. But I'm hopeful. Maybe I'll fall in love with running and this will change my life. Maybe not. We'll just take it (literally) one step at the time. And I'll share the lessons/insights with you as they come.

I'll also try not to whine about running in every post from now until April, but we'll see how that goes.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

CHANGING

I'm turning over some leaves. In life more than on the blog.

The first leaf will never be finished, but finishing isn't as important as starting.
The second leaf has already been turned for me and will take a while to mend.
The third leaf you'll read more about after this weekend.
The fourth leaf's number has been disconnected.
The fifth and sixth leaves will be turned by May. Maybe later. Maybe sooner. I don't know.

One thing I do know? Leaf-turning is never easy. Say a prayer if you have time.

NOISY

So, my sister has convinced me to enter a contest and I need your help.

In case you didn’t know, The Little Mermaid is now a Broadway play (when Broadway's not on strike, of course). They are having a singing contest online. The person with the most votes (notice I said “person with the most votes” not “person with the best voice”) gets airfare, a hotel room, 2 tickets to the show and 2 passes to the cast recording of the musical’s soundtrack.

http://broadwayworld.com/mermaidvote.cfm?id=161

That is the link to click if you want to hear me sing the Disney classic “Part Of Your World” and more importantly, if you want to vote for me! You don’t even have to watch the video all the way through... or at all. Which is fine with me. I’m kind of embarrassed I’m even doing this. So at least help make it worth my while and vote for me and then forward/share the link with anyone else whom you think would jump on board. Voting ends December 3. And I think you can only vote once per computer. Maybe once a day per computer.

I apologize in advance for the poor quality of the video... and of my voice.

Monday, November 19, 2007

JEALOUS

Remember how I told you Evan met David Schwimmer?

Well guess who he met last night?

Jennifer Aniston, of course.

And yes, he did the right thing and called me shortly afterward.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

STARSTRUCK

I wasn't even planning to go into Target. I was at the store next door and realized I had some free time, so why not waste some time in God's gift to budgeters?

I tried on some clothes. Nothing worked. I found some black flats. Decided to buy them.

I wandered through the DVDs and was just noticing that all the Friends seasons are $14.88 a piece (another blog in itself) when I happened to glance at the woman next to me.

Tiny brunette. Heart shaped face. Sparkling blue eyes. Her CD was on the shelf behind me.

IT WAS MARTINA MCBRIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I debated about whether or not to discretely ask her to autograph her new CD since it was an arm's length away but I got shy. Do you think she was there spying to see who was buying it? She had a stack of DVDs in her hand. It must be someone's birthday because she was buying DVDs by the armful.

I am sure it was her because I walked away, sent a few text messages, and then ambled back over. Her eyes cannot hide. It was her.

A year and a half later and I FINALLY got my first Nashville celebrity sighting. And it was a GOOD one. Hooray!

EXHAUSTED

Dear Real Simple Magazine's Tip On Killing A Flying Insect By Shooting It With Hairspray,

Where were you yesterday when I spent nearly an hour chasing and trying to kill the fly that was in our condo?

Love,
L

Saturday, November 17, 2007

INCREDULOUS

I have a New York story I meant to share. I guess in the 12 hours I was home between New York and the work trip, I forgot to post it.

Evan and I were eating dinner and talking about all the neat stuff he's gotten to do as an intern. He's been on TV three times, gone on a remote shoot and met some really cool people. Evan also mentioned that he got to watch 30 Rock shoot a scene in the Today Show studio. They filmed Meredith Viera interviewing someone on the Today Show set for an episode and guess who she was interviewing?


DAVID FREAKING SCHWIMMER.


It took me a second to do the math.

"Wait a second," I said, holding up my hand. "You watched 30 Rock film in the Today Show studio, and David Schwimmer was there?"


"Yeah, so was Tina Fey."

"You were in the same room as David Schwimmer?"

"Yeah, just a few feet away."

Once I started speaking to Evan again, I explained that news such as this requires a phone call, or text message at least. You don't just casually mention you met David Schwimmer with the same tone of voice you use to discuss laundry detergent, sandwiches or weather. Let me put it this way: Eric saw the Friends fountain last week and sent me a picture of it that night. Of the fountain, for crying out loud! Evan claims he didn't know how obsessed I am with the show, but he sure does know now.

The point of this story is two-fold.

First, if you are in the same room as one of the six Friends stars, I should know about it within the hour.

Secondly, Evan is living a good life: Jerry Seinfeld, Mariah Carey, Dustin Hoffman, Tina Fey, Jimmy Fallon, Steve Martin, Amy Poehler, David Schwimmer and more.

Friday, November 16, 2007

PROUD

It's no secret that I am pretty obsessed with three things: FRIENDS, friends and Auburn. Anytime I can spend time in the presence of any of those, I am a happy camper.

So knowing how obsessed I am with my school, I can sympathize with others who are equally obsessed with their school EVEN if it is the totally wrong school to be obsessed with. Passion attracts passion, I guess you could say. These healthy little rivalries are what makes being from Alabama fun. Because the people from UAT think that their school is the best, while the people from Auburn KNOW that our is school far superior.

But luckily for me, it looks like the UAT people are starting to see the light:


And no, that was not altered, doctored, photoshopped or best of all - prompted!

We'll see if he still agrees with me in a week...

Monday, November 12, 2007

AMAZED

I am heading back out the door for another work trip so there's not much time to write a funny recap of New York. But it was great, strike and all.

The best part was getting to revel in the magic that is in Studio 8H. The place is just sacred. I didn't want to leave - just ask Evan! But it was surreal to spend that much time in there and get to take pictures on the stages was incredible. Do you know who has stood on those stages and been in that room? I mean, it's like I told the boys - half of my fictional dinner party guests have performed in that room, along with the most talented actors and funniest entertainers and most gifted musicians. Awesome. Just awesome. Sorry if I sound geeky, but that room is the White House of the entertainment industry, in my opinion.

Anyway, the trip was too short and I am already ready to go back. But now I know that rather than check the weather channel before leaving on a trip, you should check CNN to see if everything you planned to do has been cancelled!


Saturday, November 10, 2007

FUMING

Is this a joke?


So I'm in New York City right now and I want to go see a Broadway play. You don't who doesn't want to go see a Broadway play? The Broadway play stagehands, who have ALSO decided to go on strike. 

STARTING TODAY, THE ONE WEEKEND I AM IN NEW YORK CITY! 

For real? WTF?

Couldn't these strikes have waited until after my vacation? What's next? Food service employees strike and there's no where to eat? I am just in shock. Shock, I tell you!

Friday, November 09, 2007

SAD

The latest example of irony in my life (try to keep up):

Saturday Night Live films 20 episodes a year.
I am going to New York one time this year.
I actually know someone who works at NBC.
He actually knows someone who actually works for Saturday Night Live.
Turns out, of all the SNL staff, that person is the person to know to get into a filming.
Which again, only happens 20 times a year.
Saturday Night Live was scheduled to film this Saturday.
I am scheduled to be in New York this Saturday.
The stars were aligning. We might have gotten to go.

But the writers had other plans.

Thanks, writers. I'm happy you're getting more money and all, but the next live episode better make me laugh so hard I wet my damn pants.

Back to packing!

Monday, November 05, 2007

READY

It's finally November! Here's how I know: the weather is finally appropriate, my calendar is filling up, and the football games are getting really good. What a great month!

Speaking of the weather, we have a fireplace in our apartment. I am a sucker for a good fire. In fact one of the things my mom and I fought about the most when I lived at home was how frequent and for how long I was allowed to have the gas logs on. My fireplace here isn't gas though, but I think I'm going to find some firewood and kindling to try to light it soon. That ought to be REALLY interesting. Or dangerous. Good thing I have renter's insurance. And my Guide To Building A Fire Worth Cuddling By. Now all I need is a Guide To Finding Someone Worth Cuddling By A Fire Worth Cuddling By.

As for my calendar filling up, I realized this weekend that I'm gone for at least three nights every week this month and 12 of the next 14 days. Two work trips, a quick but exciting trip to New York City and then Thanksgiving! All my instincts are telling me I shouldn't bother sleeping when I'm New York since I only have 48 hours there, but the trip is sandwiched between the two work trips so I will probably need to rest a little so I don't maim someone (or throw a flag) on the work trips.

And as for the last part, the football games getting good, Saturday was a wonderful prelude to the Amen Corner. Think LSU had something to prove, Bama? Just you wait.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

FLAGGED

Today I was invited to the Titans game. It was lovely football weather and possibly the only football game, college or NFL, that I'll attend this year. But that's another blog post, now isn't it?

Anyway, I've never understood penalties and rules in football. Whereas my friends and sister can spot fouls like Illegal Blocking, Holding or Pass Interference (are those the same things?), the only ones I can recognize are False Start, Offsides, and sometimes, if I'm paying attention, I spot a Facemask.

So today at the Titans game, the ref threw his flag and trotted to center field to report that the foul was for Taunting. WTF? Is this a real foul? I've heard it called Unsportsmanlike Conduct before, but he called it Taunting.

Well naturally this sent me into a fit of giggles and I got the best idea I have gotten all year. I decided I want a flag for life, so I came home and made my own "flag" similar to a referee's except mine is a bottle of Advil wrapped in a bandanna with a rubber band around it.


I am going to carry this flag around and start calling people out when they commit fouls. Most of the ones in football apply to life, including:

Illegal Procedure
or Personal fouls- Someone does something that I don't like (such as Taunting apparently)
Unsportsmanlike Conduct - Taking the last of the coffee and not making more
Equipment Violation - Stealing a pen or other office supply
False Start or Delay of Game - When someone makes me late; my boss tells me the meeting is at 2 and then is late; taking too long to do something in general
Illegal Motion
or Illegal Shift - People moving in a way I do not like, such as towards me in a crowded bar
Illegal Touching - When someone touches me when I don't want him to, including inadvertently in a bar (read: the wings got a bit annoying on Halloween)
Blocking Below the Waist - Ha. Coming between me and a cute guy?
Neutral Zone Infraction, Offsides or Encroachment - Sitting on my desk, asking too personal of information or asking me why I haven't been my usual "table dancing" self
Illegal use of Hands - Waving a cigarette in my face
Illegal Participation - Reading the blog and not commenting

And those are just off the top of my head! I haven't thought of any for Illegal Contact , Sideline Infraction or Substitution Infraction yet, but there are plenty of possibilities.

Submit your own or get called for Illegal Participation!

Saturday, November 03, 2007

CURLED

I did something today that I haven't done in a really long time.

Well, two things, if you count deep cleaning my bathroom (deep cleaning = on my knees scrubbing tile).

The other thing I did was curl my hair. I don't know what really prompted it other than I had time to kill and a piqued curiosity. I haven't curled my hair since college. Unless you count my sister's wedding, but even that day I wasn't the one to curl it and actually I wouldn't consider those curls so much as a mane.

Anyway. I used to curl my hair every morning before school. Because I have such awesome priorities and wanted to sleep in as late as possible (actually, my curlers took all freaking morning to get hot), I would wait until the very last minute, after I was dressed and all but ready to head to school before I would put the curlers in. If I had time, I'd eat breakfast at the house. If I was running late, Mom would fix it to go and I'd eat on my 4 minute trip to school. I would have breakfast finished by the time I got out of the neighborhood, and then without a second to spare, I'd take the curlers out on the quarter-mile drive between my neighborhood and my school. The last one would be coming out as I was pull into school parking lot. I had it to a science, I tell you.

Looking back, this whole routine was probably not a good idea. I'm surprised I didn't get made fun of (to my face at least). But it did teach me one valuable lesson - the art of driving with my knee.

Off to school I go!

Friday, November 02, 2007

(STILL) ANGELIC

Halloween deserves another post. Especially because I left off the picture of me with my "boss":

(That would be me with "Jesus" [not Osama Bin Laden or Satan like my mom thought].)

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