Tuesday, June 05, 2007


While I was at home for like 4 hours this weekend, my mom was bombarding me with stuff: bills, pictures, invitations, etc. I was only semi-listening until she thrust a thank-you note which she recently received in my face and exclaimed "Look at this - she didn't even write it!"

I threw down my hair straightener and grabbed the note. Sure enough, the handwriting on the lovely embossed stationery was 100% NOT the bride's. At first I was horrified. I mean, if you invite 1000+ people to your wedding (which was almost a year ago [strike one]), you're digging your own grave. Yes, you'll receive a crap-ton of nice gifts, but you have to write a thank-you note for each! But come on, it can't take THAT long, can it?

I was sitting on the floor, mourning over what the world has come to since now people don't even write their own thank-you notes, when my mom said "You should totally start doing this."

DING! I think Linda could be on to something.

Still, part of me does not want to encourage this practice. At some point, between unpacking your new gifts and having all the sex, I would guess that there is time for you to pen your own dad gum thank-you notes! But, should you find it physically impossible to do so, or if you just plain don't want to, call me and we'll talk price per note.

The rule of thumb is NO LONGER a year to get those thank-you notes out, brides (I'll show you in my massive Etiquette book if you want). It's like a few months, max. So if you are running out of ink and time, call me.

Because a thank-you note obviously not written by you is far more preferable than NO thank-you note at all (and don't even get me started on THAT).

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