Friday, March 03, 2006

UNSETTLED

Enough pussyfooting around.

The time has come for me to decide whether or not I want to stay in Birmingham. Four years ago, when I left this town for adventures on the plains, I thought a towtruck, commissioned by an act of congress, driven by Jesus Christ himself would not be able to drag me out of this town after graduation. I liked Birmingham. It was familiar, it was comfortable, and it had everything I needed.

Then, college happened. Doors opened and horizons expanded and in the process, I realized Birmingham, the city, was not what was familiar and comfortable. Instead, my family and friends and the traditions, memories and moments shared with them constitutes the familiar and comfortable. Additionally, my family has now been ripped in half and reduced by two. Four years later, now that everything has changed, and home is no longer the fortress I thought it was, I'm left stranded. And confused.

This pile of bricks and wood is a house, but it is not my home. I unknowingly bode goodbye to my home almost three years ago when I threw some boxes and clothes in my car and started my junior year in Auburn. That was the last time I ever felt really at home, since my dad moved out a week later. When he left, he took my home with him. The problem is that I can't find it again.

Which is why I'm confused. I don't know where I belong anymore. Birmingham is not the hotbed of comfort that it used to be. Too much has changed, including myself. Staying here would be convenient. I don't want to live a life based on convenience.

Therefore, true to my nature, I have made lists ("I make lists in my sleep, baby"). If you are reading this, then you must be my friend, and as my friend, I value your input. All readers are required to comment on this post, and suggest/advise me what I should do (and leave a little bit of encouragement, if you don't mind). I am pleading for your advice.


Pros about staying in Birmingham:
1. Majority of my family is here.
2. Some of my closest friends are here.
3. A few more months rent-free with mom.
4. I know my way around.
5. Lots of Auburn people!
6. Let's be honest... Taziki's and O'Carrs.
7. More contacts for getting a job.

Cons about staying in Birmingham:
1. A few more months rent-free with mom.
2. This city is boring.
3. My closest friends that are here are all married.
4. I'm tired of my mother borrowing my clothes.

Pros about moving to Nashville:
1.
I've always wanted to.
2. My dad is there (in case of an emergency).
3. I could sing a lot more!
4. Famous people live there!
5. I have some friends (single and my age) that live there.
6. It's a fun city!
7. I would get to find a new church.
8. I would get to live with a best friend again this summer!


Cons about moving to Nashville:
1. Higher cost of living.
2. I know less people there.
3. For some reason, I feel that if I move I might miss out on something here in Alabama. But at the same time, If I don't move, I could miss out on something in Tennessee.
4. Finding a place to live for 1-2 months until the summer.

Like I said before, if you think you know me well enough, please leave me a comment and give me your input. I would value it. If you don't know me well enough... then why are you reading my blog?!?

PS: Please notice that I correctly predicted all 3 of the bottom vote getters for the women and 2 of the 3 of the boys on American Idol... 5 outta 6 ain't bad. Mabye I should take Paula's place, since it became clear last night that she's more interested in smoking marijuana than judging the show...

2 comments:

  1. Birmingham and Nashville are only a few hours apart...so if you go to Nashvegas, you can still come to Birmingham and visit.

    I would never want you to miss out on something because you are afraid you will miss out on something else.
    Go with your gut. You have prayed about it, so take a leap of faith and follow what your heart is saying.

    Is your heart clear yet? If it is, then don't analyze this and go...if it's not clear, it's OK to wait.
    God is not going to require you to jump through hoops to hear Him. Just seek Him and listen. It might not be a clear "BIRMINGHAM!" or "NASHVILLE" but it might be that you have a peace when you say, 'I'm going to Nashville" or "I'm staying in Birmingham."

    Tonight, tell yourself that you are moving to Nashville. Then sleep on it and see what you think in the morning.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You know I'm kinda suprised, you always seemed like the adventerous person who wouldn't want that at home saftey net. To me it seems there is very little left for you to do in birmingham. You've done that. It's time for something new. You'll meet new people and have new excitement. I dont know you real well aside from what I saw in CWE, but that CWE lindesy wouldn't have ever stayed in B'ham.

    On another more important note, I'm impressed with the guesses, who'd you get wrong? I thought bucky would go before patrick, I mean you can't have 2 rockers and the bald wonder is definately better.

    ReplyDelete

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